Victims of Drive-by grafitti artists

"Hi, Honey! I spent my day getting a make-over!
The hair-stylist said my long, blond hair was out and this cut was all the rage! Then the woman at the make-up counter said I needed to wear a little more make-up. She kept squinting while she was putting it on. She said she forgot her glasses at home....but, what REALLY made me a little nervous was when I went to get a new pair of ear-rings and the girl with the piercing gun got a terrible case of hiccups....what do you think? Honey?....Honey?...Where are you going? Honey?......"
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When Joe's wife told him to get a spine, he never suspected it would come with a zipper.
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Since they took the swings off the playground, the kids had to find a new way to hang out.

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"Wouldn't you know it! My first party and I get this nasty zit! Now everyone's staring at it! I shoulda used that Clearasil! Bummer!!! I know all the chicks are thinking there goes zit-boy! My reputation is ruined!"
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"An then thee thaid dat thee'd gib me a wing.....I thought id wath on da fon!"

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"Wow, man! Like I dozed off on this bench across the tatoo school and when I like woke up......!"
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A REAL Coca-cola pin-up model! Luckily the store was out of the boss-sized Coke!